Mr. Brightside

On a positive note my son has killer taste in music. His favourite song is a remix of THE KILLERS 'Mr. Brightside' (great song - listen to it). On a negative note he is slowly destroying all of our possessions and depleting all personal grooming supplies slowly but methodically.

Today my brand new mouthwash, jay's shampoo, the Cif bathroom cleaner, and a whole roll of toilet paper fell prey to his sticky fingers. So did our miniature disco ball (he systematically picked off all the little mirrored squares), our stairgate and a whole box of cheerios.

It must be said that at least he varies his responses when we reprimand him. Some times he says, "Come on guys" and other times its, "Don't shout at Eggie". He is also partial to, "No say naughty words Mama" and "Don't push me Dada". The boy isn't shy.

Little Ollie Dumpie is fascinated with his older brother and looks on indulgently when Egg is being punished for the umpteenth time in an hour. They may well be co-conspirators as today jay's 20pence piece was found down in between Ollie's bum cheeks. Might this mean a future career as drug smuggler? Should i begin a daily rota of spot checking Ollie to make sure he's not being tampered with?

Perhaps all this means is that I had better rejoin the 'Wine Of the Month Club' and learn to anethetise myself like all other parents have done through the ages. Things may appear a little less tragic when gazed through the haze of a Pinot Noir. Off i pop.