Wednesday 14 July 2010

"The Yoga Lady, Mexican 'Kitty-Cats', and a Very Bad Viewing"

Last night Yoga Lady from next door wandered in and had a little chat before helping herself to some more movies from what is apparently a free dvd lending library I have, unbeknownst to myself, set up here in our front room.  My girlfriend who was over at the time was doing her best to maintain a serious expression whilst conversing with Yoga Lady, but almost lost it when she heard her describe herself as 'physically challenged'.


(Yoga Lady is challenged alright, but it would appear to be more in the mental and emotional realm, as opposed to whatever 'Chi'-depletion concerns she feels are at work...)

Kadek our pembantu was awfully glad to see my girlfriend, as she used to work for her and clearly prefers her old boss to her current one.  This was made infinitely clear when Kadek began an impromptu massage on my girlfriend here at the table.  When finished, as Kadek walked around the table towards me, I helpfully moved my hair aside so she could have a go on my neck.  Kadek just kept walking...towards the kitchen.

Oh well.

Any thoughts of having a disconsolate employee on our hands were soon tossed aside at dinner, where we had joined our friends at a nearby Mexican eatery.  Ordering was a quick and easy affair, once we ascertained that they were without any corn tortilla's - a mainstay of Mexican cuisine - thereby rendering three quarters of the menu redundant.

Two quesadillas and bean burritos later, we found ourselves the objects of scorn and derision from pretty much the entire restaurant, as Dumpie and the other three year old, got on their hands and knees and spent the next half hour making screeching cat noises and crawling frantically under and around the big wooden tables.

We took turns trying to catch them, but they were bloody fast and squirmy, and just as one was caught the other would break free with cries of delight and hurl themselves back onto the floor to begin the manic chasing game again, scraping their filthy knees in delight as we all eventually conceded defeat and pretended to studiously ignore our embarrassingly ill-mannered offspring.

At any rate, the highlight of our day had to be when an acquaintance of ours showed up to view our 'soon to be vacant' property.  Informing him that we were to be evicted, it was several minutes of cringeworthy fantastic-ness as we invited him to have a look around the place regardless, while he stood awkwardly at the door, shamefaced, not knowing how to proceed.  Like clockwork, the buzz of construction started up again, and over the noise, as he departed, we mouthed the words, "Rats" and his eyes widened as he waved hesitantly goodbye.  I don't think he'll be taking the place.

Funnily enough Yoga Lady doesn't mind the rats.  She told us that the current rat infestation has in fact inspired a chapter in her 'book' she's writing, called, originally, 'Rodent's'.  I've asked if I can read it when she's done.

Perhaps I can get a free copy of the book in exchange for a lifetime dvd rental membership...

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