"Fraught-opoly"

Egg has become OBSESSED with the game Junior Monopoly. So much so that his teacher has leant him the board game to bring home over Easter holidays. Much to our despair however, he seems unable to handle losing, and has taken to exhibiting mild freak-out behavior when this occurs (which is every time so far).

To add insult to injury, Dumpie appears to have a natural knack for the game (or maybe just 'winning' in general?) despite not having a clue how it's played. Try as he might to appease his older brother by giving him too much money and allowing himself to be cheated out of receiving 'property taxes' when Egg lands on his square...he just can't help winning - despite himself.

By this point in the game, Egg will be mournfully holding out a paltry bill or tow, whilst Dumpie sits quietly beside him, clutching a fat wad of the coloured play money, trying to give an inconsolable Eggie some cash 'for free' but Egg is having none of it. Instead, he sobs, "But it's NOT FAIR! Dumpie ALWAYS wins!"

Dumpie smiles gamely and sits calm as a buddha, legs gently crossed, dirty little toes wiggling to and fro, waiting patiently for his turn to roll the dice and make even more money (sigh).

The game always ends the same way. Eggie loses by not having enough money left to pay Dumpie, and after trying to swipe some notes from the bank, in one brutal, desperate bid to continue the game despite his cheating, he'll throw everything to the floor, tears rolling down his face, kick the board and run sobbing from the room.

Poor angel. Dumpie will then get so upset by Egg's sudden rage and incomprehensible hatred, that he'll start sobbing too, and I'm left with the mess of trying to calm down two runny-nosed, hyperventilating little monsters all the while threatening, "You are NEVER playing this game again! Do you hear me?!"

Until of course, the incessant, relentless, whining and begging from Eggie to play causes me to acquiese or suffer a nervous breakdown. I give in...foolishly...and the whole nightmare starts once again - from the top.