Thursday 26 November 2009

"If You Think I'm Sexy...Come On Dumpie Let Me Knoooowwww"

This week Dumpie has incorporated two new words into his vocabulary: 'sexy' and 'damn it'. As shameful as it is to admit, I am more perplexed than anything. Do I say 'Damn it'? Maybe I do, but I don't think so....

As for 'sexy', that ones a real worry. The last thing I need is to be in a fitting room trying on a dress and have a sales clerk overhear my three year old saying, "You look sexy Mama" (which is what he told me yesterday). Urghhh.

I remember when Egg was around the same age and went through his potty mouth period. We had an electrician in the next room fixing one of our sockets and he yelled at me in the kitchen telling me to 'Piss Off!' (Eggie, not the electrician). I kid you not.

The husband tells me I should just ignore Dumps and he'll stop saying these words. He clearly doesn't understand how hilarious it is to have the expression 'Damn it' emitted from the pursed lips of a toddler as he drops his Pokemon cards into his Rice Krispies.

Speaking of Pokemon cards, those things have become the bane of my life. The husband finally gave into Egg's pleas and bought thirty of them for some ridiculous amount on the weekend from the overpriced and overcrowded toy shop down the road. Apparently you have to ask for them behind the counter.

Egg got twenty and Dumps got ten. After school on Monday a rather sombre Egg came home mumbling about how he only had thirteen Pokemon cards now, as some classmates had asked for 'free cards'. My little angel had, in typical fashion, kindly handed over his newly acquired cards, and not insisting on a 'swap' (which is what you are supposed to do with them).

The next day his Auntie and I told him to ask these same children for a card too, thus perhaps reinstating his now paltry collection to its former glory. No such luck. On Tuesday Egg came home with only twelve Pokemon cards (sigh). Poor little fella.

Dumps is wise to Egg's deepening despair and keeps a tight rein and watchful eye - at all times- 0n his pack of nine cards. He carries them around in a tupperware sandwich box. This sandwich box must accompany him at all times and is tucked away in bed with him each night. He uses his now almost equal number of cards to taunt Eggie with, and as a result the number of fights, wrestling matches, and accidental murder attempts due to being pushed down the stairs, has almost doubled this last week.

I hate Pokemon cards.

6 comments:

  1. This made me laugh because Bel and Car but not very clearly like stating how I've got SEXY BOOBIES or SEXY BUM BUM. I've mu husband to thank for that!
    BNM

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  2. Love the thought of the little un saying 'damn it'! My 4 year old often says 'bloody' and 'oh. my. god.' with a roll of his eyes - it makes me smile, although I know it shouldn't and I really don't encourage it, honest!

    As for Pokemon cards - ugh tell me about it. Bain of my life!

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  3. Pokemon not hit my little angels consciousness yet. Judging from this, I shall strive to keep it that way!

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  4. I've walked all the way over from London Mums Blog ;) My Daughter who is 3.5 mentioned the word sexy the other day too, I blogged about it as well, it took me by surprise!

    Shame he's loosing his cards considering you had to pay a fortune for them!

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  5. We've managed to avoid the "bad" words so far (famous last words (both bad and otherwise)) but was very entertained by a friend's two year old who dropped something on the floor, looked down at it, and let out an exhausted, been up all night, got fifteen loads of washing and three weeks worth of baby mush to make, obviously maternal "oh f*ck"...!

    Anyway, Brit in Bosnia suggested I pop over because I'm taking my three monsters (L aged 2 1/2 and S&A will be just 1) to Canada in two weeks time and am beginning to panic slightly. BiB says you've done it and survived. Any tips?

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  6. You see? That's why I'm thankful I have two girls. We don't even know what Pokemon cards are in this house. Except of course we do cos I'm just a cool Mum and I remember from my youth, but you know what I mean! x

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