'Jetlaggia'

Arrived home this morning from ten days in St. Lucia avec Jay's famille. We had the good luck to be jammed in a train carriage from Gatwick full of grumpy monday morning commuters, and Dumpie's loud shrieks and Egg's constant jabbering likely did much in the way of making our fellow passengers wish they were dead (or we were).

Yesterday at the airport I sufferred the embarrassment of Egg staring doggedly at an overweight lady opposite him, cramming her mouth full of crisps whilst devouring a romantic novel. Soon he started whining for crisps too and moments later the lady beside him got up and returned with a can of sour cream and onion Pringles - a large handful of which she felt obliged to hand over immediately to the salivating Dumpie (who was gesturing at them with his arm and making grunting noises) and Egg (who was plaintively staring the can down). Humiliating....especially when Egg continued to loudly request more.

I'm simply too shattered to go into detail about our week away in the Caribbean, but suffice it to say that we've all returned a) browner (we were pretty much the only 'Johnston' contingent to not suffer sunburn at some point b) fatter (thanks to the 24 hour all-inclusive buffet and open bar - hiccup burp hiccup) and c) disgruntled (when you've spent your days stuffing your face, lying prone in the hot sun and moving only to shunt yourself around the 'lazy river' - a manmade inner tube ride which slowly lulls you around the grounds much reminiscent of a hippo - it's a wee bit tricky to adjust to real life again and a faster pace of life.

At any rate, the boys upstairs have finally stopped screaming themselves to sleep (they are jetlagged within an inch of their lives and are likely going to wake bolt upright sometime around 3 am) and Jay has just finished drying out the flood which happened in our kitchen while we were away. I would be a fool not to roll myself into bed now and try to get some rest before the screeching chicken rears its ugly/cute head and tomorrow is upon us.

I have an early morning visit from a spun out cable guy to look forward to. If his visit is anything like his last he shall be climbing out our various windows like a monkey, spilling cups of tea and dirtying up the house with muddy trainers. And for this I'll get the pleasure of handing him a load of cash and running around keeping two boys from leaping out the open windows. Fun fun fun.